Hello I am Sonia and I am too embarrassed to get a spray tan professionally done. Now it is by no means that I do not like Faux Tans, in fact I slather on the old St Tropez like a camel drains water (huh???). I am no prude either - I have no problem getting my puppies out at an Intimo party to try on bras.
Nope, there is no other reason except, I have huge scars on my legs and vanity prevents me from wearing short skirts, parading on the beach in only my cossie and getting tans sprayed on by others.
I know that I am being incredibly pathetic in all reality and you can most certainly add shallow to that list as well while you're at it. But I just feel like I am exposing myself to something so private and painful by putting my scars on show to the world.
I admire those others who wear their scars with pride, and I really wish I could be more like you.
The truth is only a very few people have seen those scars, and it is not that I am afraid you are going to judge me or feel sorry for me, I just don't want those scars to be WHO I am.
We all have scars. It may be our Jelly Bellies from carrying our gorgeous children, it could be the scar on your chin you got from the floor rising up to hit you after one too many mojitos or perhaps it is the scar from a Brazilian that went seriously wrong. Some scars run deeper than just on the surface level and it is probably not the scars themselves that bother me the most, it is the pain on the inside that those scars represent.
I am not going to go into how I got my scars. If you really want to know, you can click here.
My beautiful hubby loves me, ganky legs and all and his unconditional love for me gives me the strength and confidence I sometimes need. The relief I get from his love and acceptance is more therapeutic to my war wounds and a far better remedy than any plastic surgeon or gallons of bio-oil could offer.
One day, I might be brave enough to face my fears and take a picture of my scars to show you. Maybe ... one day... then again... Maybe not!
Make sure you make your way over to Where's My Glow to check out all the other fabulous blogs :)
That's not shallow at all! I don't really plan on ever wearing a bikini again because of my post-baby wrinkly jelly belly, even though popular opinion would dictate to be proud of my body because of my babies. We should only do what makes us feel comfortable. Thanks for sharing!ReplyDelete