So It Turns Out I am Possibly a Stalker... or Something Like That | Life Love and Hiccups: So It Turns Out I am Possibly a Stalker... or Something Like That
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Tuesday, 4 February 2014

So It Turns Out I am Possibly a Stalker... or Something Like That

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I have been having some pretty weird dreams lately. Come to think of it, weird dreams are kind of a norm for me and weird is par for the course when it comes to being me in general. But last night's dream takes the cake as far as my most recent weird dreams go.

Last night I had a dream about Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt and how I came to be their personal nanny.

Dreaming about Brad Pitt is not a new thing for me. I have no idea why as he is nowhere near the top of my list of hot Hollywood studs. Those top spots are usually reserved for the likes of George Clooney, Josh Duhammel, Robert Redford and various other hot dead guys like Paul Walker (RIP). But for some reason Brad keeps making an appearance and who am I to deny him?

I recall a dream I had late last year about Brad. In my dream he was still married to Jennifer Aniston, but after he discovered he had completely fallen for me, he asked me to break the news to Jen for him. I was sort of pissed at him for making me do that to her, but to Jen's credit, she was very understanding and handled the whole situation very gracefully given the circumstances.

What you can't believe that would happen? She did, she really was very good about it.... oh you mean you can't believe that Brad would pick me over Jen? Yeah I couldn't believe it either but in my dreams I am totally irresistible like that.

Anyway on to last night's dream.

So I was at this random wharf when I discovered that Brangelina were staying in a house right there. They and all their kids were congregating in the backyard overlooking the water having a BBQ and I was overcome with a heady combination of curiosity and fascination and felt compelled to get closer to them and have a sticky beak.

Next thing you know I'm standing in their kitchen helping myself to a margarita and realising that I had no place being there, so I picked up one of their really cute babies and announced that I was their new nanny.

Freaky right.

But wait it gets worse.

So apparently it turns out that I am the best nanny they have ever had and so they invited me to become the captain of their luxury cruiser. One minute I am standing on a random wharf stalking a celebrity family and the next I am steering an enormous boat through Sydney Harbour. It turns out that I just so happen to be a really good boat steerer too and so they decided to adopt me.

I can't remember much more of the dream, except the part where when we got back to the house I took of my sneakers and put my feet up on the luxurious leather couch ready to watch some reality TV with Angelina. Brad walks in and tell me I have the worst foot odour he had ever smelt. I was beyond mortified and Angelina insisted her styling team give her best nanny, best boat steerer and apparently her new best friend (me) a pedicure.

So Freudians... go to town. What do you make of my bizarre dream? Am I a closet Brangelina groupie with massive stalker issues or should I just blame the dream on the green curry dinner and an ad I saw for the Benjamin Button movie?

Do you remember your dreams? What was the last weird dream you had that you can remember?