Psssst... Anyone There? | Life Love and Hiccups: Psssst... Anyone There?

Saturday, 21 July 2018

Psssst... Anyone There?

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It's been SO long since I've blogged that the chicken sausage is practically a *geriatric these days.
*a gross overstatement but whatevs

Ahhh hello.

Anyone there?

Holy crap there's a lot of dust in here.

It has been SO long since I have opened my little old blog that I actually had a complete mental blank and couldn't even figure out how to get in the back end.

Cue the head slap 🙈

Seriously though - I am not even kidding, January was the last time I wrote in my blog... JANUARY!

And that post in January was one of the two blog posts that I wrote since the last time I took a break from blogging.

Once up on a time, I blogged frequently and regularly... like flipping clock work. In fact, truth be told - my blogging was probably more frequent than my bowel movements.

Oooooo too much info right?

Sorry - It seems that I am ridiculously out of practice with this.

For months I have written and rewritten by 'return to blogging' post in my head.

I mentally scribbled thoughts and things that I wanted to say and I drafted many a different reason as to explain why I haven't blogged for so long.

Honestly though... any excuse I could think of was probably a whole load of stuff and nonsense because the truth is... I kinda just lost my heart for blogging for a while there and after some time went by, I kinda just lost my nerve too.

It was a bit like that long overdue phone call that you owe a friend.

You know, the one you have promised you will call for like FOREVER and yet every night you as you are about to go to sleep you think "SHIT" I didn't call such and such... again?

Yep that one.

And so racked with guilt you go to sleep vowing to make the call tomorrow...  and then tomorrow comes and goes, and then weeks pass by, and then some more, and there you are and you still haven't made that call.

You put it off and off and and then some more and then one day you find yourself sitting in your car waiting for one of your kids to finish football training / school / work / (insert a zillion other reasons for you to be waiting for your kids) and you say "Right, I'm gonna make that call RIGHT NOW" and as you pick up the phone to dial you suddenly find yourself all shy and nervous about making the call and so you make a promise to yourself that you will do it another day... or week... or maybe, perhaps, some time this year but probably (most likely) the next one...

Or something like that.

I have NO IDEA why one would get so nervous about something like not making a phone call or writing on a blog.

I mean it's not like we've done anything wrong... except maybe the part about being a bit of a crappy friend for forgetting (ok avoiding) calling for so long but apart from that...

So what's with all the nervous crap?

It's like that first poo you have to do after you give birth...

You know the one that they insist you have to do before they are going to let you leave the hospital with your baby?

I mean HELLO - you are happy to just let me walk out of this hospital with a brand new extremely fragile human life in my hands but you're not going to let me go with a full bowel????

Okaaaaay.

The thing is... you know what you are meant to do right?

When it comes to pooing that is.

It's not like you've not done it millions of time before or anything and yet now for some reason you've gone and got all nervous about it you are putting it off and off until whoah it's getting bigger than Ben Hur... (the thought of pooing that is, not the actual poo...) but then again, I guess it depends on how long you wait because I mean if you are still in the maternity wing by the time your baby turns 3 and you haven't yet opened your bowels then I suppose there is a risk you are going to have to give birth again but this time to a...

Sorrrrrrry!

I can't believe it's been a zillion years since I have blogged and then when I finally I do - the whole post is about crap... like LITERALLY!

Anyways, I think you get my point.

I lost my heart for blogging there for a while (I'll explain why in another post) and so I took a break from blogging and then the longer I waited to blog again, I simply just lost my nerve to blog full stop.

It's as simple as that.

No fancy excuses, no big dark juicy secret as to why I've not blogged.

Just that.

But hey - here I am.

I guess you could say I'm back, and I do have SO much I am busting to tell you and SO much to fill you in on from the past six months.

I promise though... and I mean I PROMISE, my next post won't be quite so full of shit!

*** This post has been sitting in my drafts for quite a few weeks now and then tonight, I read this gorgeous post from my beautiful friend Sandra, and suddenly I found all the nerve I needed to hit publish on this draft. Thank you Sandra... for the boost of courage I had been waiting for to get me over the line.