Who The Frig is Martha Mudguts? | Life Love and Hiccups: Who The Frig is Martha Mudguts?
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Wednesday 11 September 2013

Who The Frig is Martha Mudguts?

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I have had 2 people ask me in the past week ... who is Martha Mudguts?

One of you thought it was like a contributor that I bring into the blog to do crafts. That gave my pelvic floor a work out.

I suppose I have never really given you the story of Martha Mudguts have I? She just appeared one day on the blog and being the pushy thing she is, she likes poking her head in often. And to anyone new to my blog, I suppose she may possibly cause a little confusion.

Well my friends, just to clear the matter up Martha Mudguts is my vodka cocktail swilling, craft loving domestic goddess wannabe alter ego. She usually appears after I have had one too many caprioskas whilst reading a homey magazine ... and she is very fond of appearing after disastrous shopping trips. You know the ones where you fall in love with EVERYTHING and the budget wont allow you to purchase a single thing...

Yep those.

Martha likes to try and recreate the things she can't afford to buy and she is not afraid to tackle a project or 10 at any given time. Basically she is more than a little loopy and her ideas are often way bigger than her ability.

The name actually came from my Mum and Dad who would religiously watch every episode of Martha Stewart's show and they affectionately named her Martha Mudguts. I have no idea why.... actually I do, but I don't want to be sued so let's just pretend that I don't.

I liked the name and one day when I discovered the inner craft lover hiding behind a pile of ironing somewhere in a dusty corner of my sub-conscience, we became friends and I bestowed that name upon her.

Lucky thing.

Martha typically hangs out in this back room of the house, sipping on cocktails whilst watching lifestyle programs and reading interiors porn. Alternatively she perches herself on the deck out beyond those doors where she has a birds eye view of her victim... I mean the room she likes to foof around in.

She flips from one project to the next, the speed in which depends on how bored she gets, or how many cocktails she's consumed.

She has learnt the hard way that too much vodka and glue guns mix as well as margaritas and Karaoke (which is not well) and she wears the scars to remind her.

She changes her colour preference from season to season, and at the moment she is all about yellow - did ya guess???

She likes to try to bake stuff and frequently reorganises stuff and pretty much likes to do anything that distracts her from sitting down and doing her taxes. The irony is not lost on me ( don't worry Mr Taxman, My Martha doesn't go much for ankle bracelets so the tax will be done.... soonish).

So hopefully that explains who Martha Mudguts is. I have yet to find her cousin who I believe is very handy in the laundry. I like to imagine that she is simply lost or completely sloshed on martinis ... either or, and that's why she hasn't yet made an appearance.

Have you got any alter egos? Come on... spill the dirt!