Reflections & Promises | Life Love and Hiccups: Reflections & Promises
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Tuesday 31 December 2013

Reflections & Promises

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It's been a year of change in these parts - both good & wonderful even, some not so great and some I am kind of indifferent to.

Everyone I speak to has very strong opinions about 2013. Some have not entirely enjoyed the ride but have battled through rejoicing in the opportunity to say sayonara 2013. Others have found the year to be cathartic for them and have embraced the topsy turviness that each month brought.

Whatever you feel about the year that has just been, I think we can agree that in general it has been a big one, and one that you wont forget in a hurry.

In the past 12 months I feel like I have discovered so many new personalities under my exterior. Emotions, strengths and cracks I didn't even know existed. I have made big decisions, life changing decisions and I still marvel that I had the balls to go through with some of the things I have.

In 2013 I turned 40 and much to my delight I didn't shrivel up like a dried out old pea, instead I bloomed in my own unique way and grew a quiet confidence that I didn't know I was capable of brewing. I ran away to Bali to ride a bike through paddy fields and soak up the serenity of such a magical place and I quit the corporate world after 20 years of working my guts out. I walked away from a well paid job to live a life less busy, only to find myself busier in many ways.

I had a major health scare that caused me to reevaluate life. I made a promise to never be complacent about my health again and when the dust settled I sort of, kind of, mostly went back to my old ways.

I found strength I didn't know I had, pushed it too far and lost it again. Finally I have come to a place of acceptance.

My children grew up and we celebrated milestones that induced tears of joy and pride and yet at other times the tears they induced were not of such a sweet kind. But they are here beside me facing a new year, strong and healthy and for that I am grateful with every atom of my being.

My beautiful husband has more grey hair, but it's sexy and I assure him I like it in a George Clooney LIKE it kind of way. He has worked hard to carry the load and fill the financial gap left by my mid life crisis and he has worked even harder to carry me when there were days I failed to find any strength.

We have argued, we have loved, we have cried and we have laughed. We have kicked the ass of 2013 together.

I don't make new year's resolutions anymore, cause I suck at sticking to them and always feel like a bit fat failure when I cave in.

This year I am making promises to myself, to try to give more focus to specific areas in my life. They aren't black and white, succeed or fail kind of situations, instead they are journeys or paths I have made the decision to include in the road map I have planned for 2014.

I will focus on slowing down, being more in the moment and not letting my worries dictate how I choose to live.
I will spend more time reconnecting with those who have been neglected with all the crazy busyness I allowed to build up.
I will try to give more time to the things that make my heart sing and less on the things I do purely out of obligation.
I will try to spend less and re purpose more.
I will work on being more respectful of my body and more nurturing of my soul.
I will allow myself to love more freely and be more open with showing that love.
I will write that God Damn book before the year ends.
I will try...

Everyone knows that journies mean adventure and adventure is not always a smooth ride, so I am facing the new year with a realistic expectation that there will surely be bumps, there will most definitely be annoying detours, but to balance it all out there will be those unexpected roads you accidentally take that are so wonderful that they steal every last bit of breathe from your lungs, but in a good way. The type of way where you feel that you can exist without anything as trivial as air and your soul sings to the heavens ....

"Holy Shitballs people, this... THIS is life".

I just want to take this opportunity to say thank you. Thank you for the love, the laughs, the support and the camaraderie. You have played a huge part in defining 2013 and how it will be remembered. For you my wish is that 2014 is full to the brim of everything you ever dreamt of. Stay happy and stay safe. See you next year!

Was 2013 a year to remember or a year to forget for you?
What's one memory from 2013 you would lock away safely and carry forward with you to the endless new years ahead of you?